Thursday, September 26, 2024
Saw this post which i post in FB in 2011. Till now, this sentence still reasonate with my feelings towards those i love/loved.
"Its not about how long the relationship/ friendship is, its about the 真心 that is given out, 越是真惜的那个人，越感觉心痛。。。"
有时候好想再也不付出真心，好想不要那么重感情，因为我很害怕又再一次受伤. Sometimes i hope i can be more hard hearted, but thats just not me. For those who hurt me, my mouth maybe bad, but actually in my heart, i will truly just wish they stay happy and well.
If only my memories can be erased...
曾经的我很善良，也很真诚，很心软，可是现实让我看透人性，教训让我看清人心，时间和经历让我明白，人心不一定能换来人心，善良不一定能换来真诚，心软会让别人得寸进尺，善良会成为别人刺伤你的利刃和筹码，我依然是我，我也不再是我….
Shujuan7:25 PM
Sunday, September 15, 2024
i guess no one reads this blog anymore..
feel so drain, behind that smile, i really went through alot of pain.. :(
Since poly year 2/3, a quadrant of my molar chipped off, had to go through my first root canal for my molar at the age of 19, the process is painful sometimes even with long anesthesia administered...since then every few years there will be many tooth issues, done many root canal under the age of 25, no money then, so i did not do any crown after the root canal, there was once one of my upper molar just suddenly broke off while on flight, i was only 24 then.
in 2012, one of the pre molars broke into half, finally plucked up courage to visit a dentist for all the tooth issues.. plucked out about 5 or 6 tooth in total including molars, pre molars, wisdom tooth, it was the worse year of my life. at 28, i lost many teeth, dental pain, heart pain cos dental treatment is not cheap..
Slowly, i did implants for all the tooth, stil its never ending, paid alot of money, almost 20 to 30k for the whole implant..going thru needles again and again for all these procedures, my whole mouth seems like gg plastic surgery.. last year one of my front tooth suddenly decay and had to go thru another root canal.. and today on the 15 sep 2024.. my last bottom molar broke again.. gg to extract it off tmr.
i really feel so sad and tired over this repeating process of extractions, root canal, implants, 我真的精疲力尽。。。due to all these, i am allergy to antibiotics and i think its making my body weak too..
what can i do? i feel so helpless, i brush my teeth, floss my teeth with flozz and interdental brush, i dont smoke and rarely drink.. why do i have such bad teeth.. why?
真的好累好累。。how long do i have to bear with these?
Shujuan5:22 PM
